Him: “I was mad at you after Devan transitioned because I thought you changed”
Me: You were mad at me because my world as I knew it was suddenly & unexpectedly altered? Yes, I changed my world went black🖤 The world that I had all these plans in with my Devan @devanrmoni. The world that I felt betrayed me, betrayed us. The world that I had now been dropped in without any warning. I didn’t ask for my world to suddenly & drastically change. I didn’t ask for my children & my gbabies world to shift at the blink of an eye.
Yes, I changed, how could I stay the same? Kim, left with her Devan yes a part of her “me” died on that same day. I mean how could I be the same woman I was before 6:00 PM September 24, 2016? We vowed, “until death do us part” so doesn’t that mean apart of her “me” had to part as well.
Yes, I changed and I will never apologize for changing & allowing Kimberly Nicole Johnson to emerge from the pain. This walk is a huge assignment it’s bigger than me. It’s bigger than what I want. I know that I am not supposed to be who I was. I also know that I can’t be who I wasn’t already! Devan was not a regular guy by any means. He was pure light and he touched people everywhere he went. He always left people with something and that something was “life” he made you want to be better. He was cut from a different cloth, God broke the mold after He created Devan💎
He lived in his purpose he was apart of me, I was apart of him. So yes I changed!
I know that many people counted me out after my Devan left this place. Many people have wondered, now what is she going to do. Many people have waited to see me fail, quit & be quiet. Some watch not because they care but because they are waiting👁
As long as my Lord & Savior tells me to go I will continue. I had to pay a price for who I am, who I’ve become. So yes, I’ve changed I’m evolving I’m being elevated. I will not apologize for being who I am!
I have decided and chosen to trust the perfect plan of God. I have decided and chosen to walk in my assignment. I have decided and chosen to please God first!
When you’ve experienced love as deep as what we have/had and it’s suddenly gone you will change too